...it is important for some people. You could help out more if you decide to.
Everyone has different preferences as to what is good or bad sex. I think this is a very important part of the “getting to know you” part of a long term relationship. If you’d like to learn or experiment, all I can say is read a lot of books. And honestly, I’d say trashy novels are a good place to start. 50 Shades of Gray was popular, but only one point of view. Fire Island is an old one with a lot of different points of view. And just about any book with a Fabio-looking guy on the front will give you all kinds of information.
That said, I do have a few pieces of advice:
1. Talk about and agree on birth control.
Unwanted babies, well, that’s not a good situation for you or the unwanted child. I know, because I'm one of them.
2. Sex does NOT mean love no matter how toe curling it is.
And honestly, most girls think it does and most boys see it as a sport. I say most, because my son always equated it with love and he got his heart broken a few times.
So, don’t assume because you have sex with someone, it means you’re in love with each other.
3. You and your partner must agree...
...on what you think is good, bad, or too weird. So you MUST talk with each other. Remember I mentioned, this is one of the three main things that will tear a relationship apart.
4. If the sex is the only good thing in your relationship...
...it is NOT enough to hold that relationship together. Especially if you’re arguing every other minute you’re out of bed.
5. Sex is best kept personal and private...
between you and your partner. It’s NEVER a good idea to talk with all your friends and relatives about your experiences.
Sincerely,
Jan
Comments 2
Recently widowed from my wonderful wife of 45 years, I have spent much time reflecting on our “SEX Life.”
It was very fulfilling, yet a very SMALL segment of our wonderful partnership.
In the past 15 years her illnesses pretty much inhibited any Sexual activity.
That had NO impact on our daily lives and sharing our love with our children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren.
One of her concerns was the seemingly perverse emphasis on the sexual side of Life in today’s Society.
She spoke often about to our Granddaughters and they agreed their marriages did not focus on SEX, rather LOVE Partnership, and real Friendship.
Thank you for your time form this 80 year old fossil
Author
Thank you, Chuck, for sharing your experience. I hope your words will help young adults know and understand that a good, solid, loving relationship is the one thing that will hold a relationship together for the long-term when the physical aspects fade for reasons that are usually out of our control.